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To the tie – rrific parent
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G.L.i.B – bed: Longthroat Memoirs
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May in review
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007: Remembering Roger Moore
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G.L.i.B – bed: In search of pleasure and balance
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For our ambassadors to the next generation, happy children’s day!
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April in review
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Knowing Kigali: Emily’s hands
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Knowing Kigali: What time is it?
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Knowing Kigali: What’s on the menu?

To the tie – rrific parent

It was a day like this when Wana Udobang penned something in the lines of ‘You’re more than just an ATM’ to you. I’m just here to reiterate (and expound on) her words. Every offspring of yours has half of your goodness, your passions, your uniqueness. The support – emotional, moral, spiritual – you willingly offer to your significant other can never, ever be rounded off into monetary value. Your presence, quirks, nuances and why you’re absolutely loved by that woman, those children are huge parts of what accounts for your true worth. You’re your son’s first hero; your daughter’s first love. You have a beautiful calling. Your children call you, dad. Your wife calls you [insert appropriate sweet, syrupy endearment here]. And God calls you His – His son. Made in His image. After His likeness. One of His finest creations (The woman is His finest!). And today, we celebrate all that makes you amazing – finances included. Happy Father’s Day!…to you and all the other wonderful dads out there.

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G.L.i.B – bed: Longthroat Memoirs

234next.com, the online newspaper which ceased to exist in 2011, will always have a special place in my heart. Here are the two reasons why: It published one of my article’s in its Sunday Elan Edition (not my first though, but this reached a bigger audience. Elan’s in print form, and the article also appeared online), and, most noteworthy, it gave me more access to Yemisi Aribisala’s way with words. Men of God as Superstars was an article by her in Farafina Magazine. My first introduction to this writer and her unique style. I read that article over and again. Then 234next.com came along. With its variety of writers among whom was…who did I see? Were my eyes playing tricks on me? It was Yemisi Aribisala allright. Writing about food, using the most unexpected, hunger-inducing terms to describe a condiment, relate a Nigerian swallow type and generally stir, furiously, the appetite in me while attempting to meet my timelines on a bright workday morning. She had me devouring, drooling and salivating over her scribblings and her content. And for one whose interest in food and its preparations bordered on necessity at the time, I looked forward to her weekly posts[…]

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May in review

The children’s month; that’s how I regard the month of May because three school – free days (holidays) await them every time it rolls in. May 1st: Workers’ Day. May 27th: Nigeria’s Children’s Day. May 29th: Nigeria’s Democracy Day. And somewhere in between these holidays is Chairman’s birthday which just increases his level of exuberance. So, it was a hip-hip-hurray moment as he became a year older and celebrated it, rather excitedly, at school. For two years in a row every May, I make certain all my posts for this month are children- centred. Not this time around though; I pay tribute to my two adorable recruits with every sound and gesture I make daily. That should suffice this year. Besides holidays and birthdays, two other things stood out for me this month as personal highlights. I recorded the most consistency in my workout routine in the last 31 days than I have done in the last six months. Extremely proud of myself. The second was acquiring a stack of books (novels, memoirs, devotional) that I’d delve into, head/eyes first, next month. I can’t wait! How did the month of May treat you?

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007: Remembering Roger Moore

Who was/is your best James Bond actor? In my teens, Roger Moore reigned supreme. He was my every day crush. Suave. Smooth and where handsome happened in all the Bond films he featured in. The ladies fell over him, and he knew just how to soften those who seemed immune to the charms he exuded. That voice of his always pitched at the right decibel when speaking to love interest or foes alike. And nobody could say, “My name is Bond, James Bond,” quite like he did. He knew how to strike a pose especially when a glass of wine and a stick of cigarette were involved. With his action moves and fantastic, out-of-this world gadgets which enhanced his status, he was the ultimate secret agent. In my opinion, he was the standard James Bond character all the others should have aspired to be; the epitome of Ian Fleming’s exact thoughts when he put the persona together in his books; and the visual attestation to my knight in shining armour…or rather in those fitting-like-a-glove suits he was always clad in. My unrivalled action hero. In my innocent, shallow, crush-crushed heart, he was it! Until I grew older. Until Pierce Brosnan[…]

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G.L.i.B – bed: In search of pleasure and balance

Among a stack of books (memoirs, novels, etc) a friend lent to me in 2014 was Elizabeth Gilbert’s bestseller- turned- movie. For the better part of April and May, I have been slowly thumping through its pages. Funny, I hadn’t realized the film was adapted from a book until I clapped eyes on it. Thankfully, I’m yet to see the film; it certainly would have soiled the reading experience for me as I’d rather glean a story from a book than its audio – visual version which would, most definitely, not capture every thought, essence of the entire written word. Last month, when I began leafing through it, I grudgingly did so. I must admit this. All the time it had been staring gloomily at me from the bookshelf, I cheerfully favoured other titles over it. Until it became my last and only resort, having devoured all the others it had come along with. Reluctantly, slowly, like a dreaded punishment, I opened its pages and asked myself only one page after: Why hadn’t I read this book before now? Divided into three sections – each depicting her travel events and knowledge in the different ‘I’ city she chose in search[…]

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For our ambassadors to the next generation, happy children’s day!

I believe the children are our future Teach them well and let them lead the way Show them all the beauty they possess inside Give them a sense of pride to make it easier Let the children’s laughter remind us how we used to be – Whitney Houston, Greatest Love of All Parents are the ultimate role models for children. Every word, movement and action has an effect. No other person or outside force has a greater influence on a child than the parent. – Bob Keeshan Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you. – H. Jackson Brown, Jr. If you bungle raising your children, I don’t think whatever else you do matters very much. – Jackie Kennedy The most important thing that parents can teach their children is how to get along without them. – Frank A. Clark You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth. – Khalil Gibran I have frequently gained my first real insight into the character of parents by studying their children. – Arthur Conan Doyle We get strength and encouragement from watching children. – Hayao Miyazaki Many children, many[…]

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April in review

The top highlight of this month should be the Easter celebrations, right? It kinda of was. For some of us – the children, my mum and I – it was spending it in a new city. So, while the Easter holidays were definitely something to write and talk about, it was more of where we celebrated it that made all the difference – more exciting and interessant. Besides T celebrating double digits’ achievement in the first week of April (her birthdate fell during exams), the rest of April’s activities were taken over by our Kigali trip. And what a trip we had! Refer to all the posts prefixed with Knowing Kigali to read about our high – altitude spell in Rwanda.

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Knowing Kigali: Emily’s hands

Physiotherapy. Therapy that uses physical agents: exercise and massage and other modalities. I hoped to be a physiotherapist once; many moons ago in my teenage years. Or a masseuse. With a parlour (back then it wasn’t called a spa) of my own. Easing out tired, tense muscles. Relaxing overworked bodies. Physiotherapist. Masseuse. Either name conjured an unusual, rare profession that I wanted to be associated with. Like diamonds, there were scarcely any therapy parlours – spas – around then; it wasn’t even considered a thing. Expectedly, friends and acquaintances regarded me with incredulous looks when I voiced out my desires. What on earth is she talking about? But it was its rarity, unfamiliarity and seeming untested terrain (in this part of the world) that held widening appeal for me, as well as my amateur practices at home. I was the resident hands when all manner of pains/aches plagued my siblings or parents. Despite the temporary relief I proffered with my little knowledge of the art (no Youtube to the rescue back then), my hands needed training, direction; I was just feeling my way through every massage I gave, improvising as I went along, adopting techniques that paid off to my[…]

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Knowing Kigali: What time is it?

Here in this freezing city of Kigali, the sun rises before 6a.m. Now that’s a first for me. I know this because by 5.45a.m, it’s dawn enough to set out on my morning walk. This phenomenon is no different in the evening. Twilight sneaks in, again, before 6.pm, startling those of us tourists who find it strange that by the time it’s past the hour, a covering of darkness has descended comfortably, significantly. It was temporarily unsettling, these changes, coupled with Kigali’s time difference (it is an hour ahead of Lagos). Don’t get me wrong. This won’t be the first time I’d encounter a different time zone but it would certainly be experiencing the combination of another time zone and its attendant unusual day/night occurrences. Together, they were quite unnerving to deal with. In a moment of childish defiance (and maybe to keep me anchored to Lagos or keep my wits about me, I don’t know which exactly), I never adjusted my wristwatch to Kigali’s local time throughout my entire stay there. With time and deliberate efforts, my entire being, however, adapted to this peculiar, premature, sky – changing instances. They didn’t stop my sense of awe every time I[…]

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Knowing Kigali: What’s on the menu?

Every morning, like a student preparing for final, defining exams, I study the map of Kigali pamphlet in the house. Where to go? What to do? What new phrase (in Kinyarwanda) to learn and put into practice (if I remember)? Which experience to explore? Bumbling my way through unfamiliar area names – Gikondo, Gisozi, Kiyovu, Gitega, Nyamirambo (Rambo?!), Kimimurura (the French and Spanish languages I learnt over the years have shown how deceptive they were! They were easy to pronounce! Want to learn a language? Try an African one and observe how your entire vocal cavity is not only manipulated but almost also violated as you attempt to articulate it. That’s exactly how I felt! I need to learn more African dialects though.) – my eyes skim past the various sections on moto taxis, accommodation, landmarks, sports and recreation before finally settling on the food section. I skip the international offerings – Italian, Indian, Mexican, French, Middle Eastern, Moroccan, even African – Ugandan, – until I arrive at the Rwandan cuisine. Excited, I read the text to discover what the local cuisine has to offer. Like a deflated balloon, my excitement is burst. If I was expecting to see sauces,[…]

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