Tag - Harcourt

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Unpublished

Unpublished

Jan. 1st Happy New Year, diary! I ended last year on a sad note. Pere and I broke up. I’m so unhappy. Jan. 9th Haven’t seen or heard from Pere in more than a week. Not that I expected to. After all the horrible things I said to him! Jan. 11th Diary, Seah was here today. She asked about Pere. Rumour has it that he was posted to Port – Harcourt for his NYSC. Jan. 14th Pere came today. He wanted to make up. I didn’t let him in. I told him off through the window. Practically shouted at him to leave before I sent the dogs after him. As I watched him leave, I wondered why I said those things to him. What is wrong with me? Jan. 22nd Seah said Pere left for Port – Harcourt yesterday. This is what she said and I quote: “Esi, you’re a total and complete fool for letting a good thing pass you by.” Jan. 24th I miss Pere. I love him. And I hate him too! Jan. 30th School’s a week away. Can’t wait! It would help take my mind off thoughts of Pere at least. Feb. 4th Diary, I’m finished! I’m done for! I’m ruined! I’m pregnant! March 5th I can’t help wondering about Pere frequently these days. As his body grows inside of me, so does my concern for him. How is he doing? And what is he up to? How is his NYSC coming? Is he coping well? Does he like…? And why am I concerned? For all I know I may never go through the NYSC programme. Thanks to him! Here I am, a single, unwed, drop –out with a two-month-old pregnancy wondering about the father, who has his whole life ahead of him. While mine ended before it begun! April 10th I hate being pregnant! I hate being unable to do anything for myself! I hate Pere for doing this to me! And I hate the cold in this county! I’m yet to adjust to the weather conditions of this country. Doesn’t the heater work any”more

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